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“If not now, when?”

  ~  the Talmud.  

I always appreciate (hahahahahaha!) coming across a quote that feels like “a stick in the eye.” Or….a boot in the butt, or…..whatever simile floats your boat. A phrase or comment that rather shouts at me “Hey, pay attention!  (Or to quote Bruce Willis’ John McClane: “Pop quiz (expletive deleted)”….  you remember that one, don’tcha?) The particular Talmudic quote/question above has raised its unarguably pointed head (pun intended) most all my life.

This past week I celebrated (privately, in Heart and Mind) the 33rd anniversary of my recovery journey. At that time, with a dad diagnosed with a terminal illness, a relatively new job in my new chosen profession, another marriage in a rocky boat, and….and….and, the choice (and it was a choice, as it always is) to ‘do’ something’ about it all “if not now, when” was loudly reverberating in my gut and head.  ‘When’ became ‘Now.’  

Thirty-three years and counting…. on more, more, more. Yesssss!

I am eternally grateful.

Historically, and today, as a prodigious listmaker I look at said-lists of things I wish to say, do, and be, discovering that same question is there in the forefront again – each and every time.  Taking the time to really answer it reveals a multitude of things, predominantly:  my habit of procrastination (Procrastination:  def:  “the spontaneous rearrangement of priorities.”  Hahahaha! A personal favorite);  the not-knowing-how;  the recognition of a whimsical-idea vs. something I really want;  my own growth-timing;  or realizing it is someone else’s ‘want’ for me to say, do, and be.  (I’ve gotten soooooo much-more-better at recognizing THAT one. Yea!  Good for me!)

So, enough about me.  What about you?  If not now, when?

(Tell me more!)